I am Walter and this is my World.

I am Walter and this is my World.

Sunday, August 30, 2009


Super ultra pug-butt thanks to Loren Boyce in Medford, Mass who sent Walter the COOLEST presents! A little Booda pig with a serious squeaker toy in it and a whole bunch of little perfect colorful pug-sized balls that are hard enough to bounce, but soft enough for a lil pug mouth to maw on them and make them squeak too! Wally loved them and we had our first quazi-game of catch!

There was also the smallest Kong ball I've ever seen, also perfect pug size and a jar of peanut butter. This photo makes me smile - look how worried wally is! I'm spreading peanut butter in the Kong, but with how many medications Wally has gotten, pills, salves creams etc...he wasn't sure it was a treat he was getting, not at first! He's looking up, saying "WHAT is she doing? Is anyone going to get me out of this or not??"

I can't believe how many people - perfect strangers- have sent Walter the kindest most thoughtful gifts. Every single gift he's gotten has become essential somehow. The healing blanket he sleeps on, the Indy blogger treats he lives for! Pug people are the best people on the whole earth. We will conduct a scientific study to prove this as soon as Wally is well enough for his trip across America to meet his fans!

Friday, August 28, 2009

Spa Pug

Walter did TWELVE minutes in in the water tank today and afterward, they turn on a spa whirlpool to relax his muscles. Jenny, the nice vet tech feeds him dried chicken liver treats whilst the jets massage his nether regions. Pretty nice set up if you ask me Wally!!!

We then did pimple ball and peanut ball before heading home for a nice long nap where we will dream of our pal, Little Miss Pearl, making a full recovery like we are!

Also, we toss our cap in the air for Winston, who with the help of his pug mom installed a FANTASTIC looking new gate out front of their home! I can hardly believe how fancy it looks and how SAFE! Plus, they call it WALLY GATE! can you believe it! Walter is helping make other pugs safer! wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooot!

Happy Friday everybody!!

Thursday, August 27, 2009

Sentry Wally

Here's a fine pose of Walter as he was being annoyed by neighbor dogs. This is where he listens closely to the various infractions occurring nearby and soon he will respond with a bark-back retort worthy of earplugs. GO WALLY! Doesn't he look wise and thoughtful?

Wednesday, August 26, 2009

Cafe Wally

Walter and I took the sage advise a blogger left yesterday - take time to kiss and relax! I loaded wally up in the strollie, and we went to a nearby cafe. I read the new IKEA catalog and had a cafe latte and he had a bowl of H2O deluxe.

We got to watch the workmen building a new playground across the street, and kids walking by with their parents. We were just like anyone else then. Just a girl and her dog watching the world go by.

We weren't thinking of rehab or medical bills or that winter is coming and we don't know where to go. All that will solve itself in time. This lovely mess we're in all has to work out somehow - and I can't wait to see what the universe comes up with.

A BIG PUG HUG and prayer to Little Miss Pearl, who underwent emergency bladder surgery today! Her momma had a funny feeling about how she was acting, and dropped her off at the vet before work, only to discover Pearl needed emergency bladder surgery! We are so grateful she made it to the vets and she will recover beautifully!

Tuesday, August 25, 2009

Balancing Act

Walter and I went to TC rehab today, where things got spiced up with some new acts to the routine. He did nine minutes in the water tank, two minutes on the trampoline and then he stood on the big ball (stimulates nerve growth in back leg) and then rolled back and forth on another, smaller ball while his back legs were on a red disk that had red "nipples" on it. The nipples are quite hard and the points also stimulate nerve growth, like kindergartner acupuncture! Dr. Tomlinson says water's making definite improvement. The whole staff there is really excellent and engaged. I spoke with another dog owner who takes her rescued Min Pin there and she said "Dr. Julia is a miracle worker." (Dr. Julia is the same person as Dr. Tomlinson btw!)

I just have to be patient. Slow and steady will win this race. I think thats been the challenge from the beginning, fighting the desperate urge to make "all this all better" right NOW. From the moment he was hit to today at the tank, I fight my anxiety to right the wrong as fast as I can. I think one of the life lessons here (did I need more?) is that life unfolds. We want to be finished fast, to get all the changes over with, but things take time. It reminds me of one of my favorite poems:

The Purpose of Time is to Prevent Everything from Happening at Once

by X.J. Kennedy, from The Lords of Misrule.

Suppose your life a folded telescope
Durationless, collapsed in just a flash
As from your mother’s womb you, bawling, drop
Into a nursing home. Suppose you crash
Your car, your marriage—toddler laying waste
A field of daisies, schoolkid, zit-faced teen
With lover zipping up your pants in haste
Hearing your parents’ tread downstairs—all one.

Einstein was right. That would be too intense.
You need a chance to preen, to give a dull
Recital before an indifferent audience
Equally slow in jeering you and clapping.
Time takes its time unraveling. But, still,
You’ll wonder when your life ends: Huh? What happened?

Sunday, August 23, 2009

Pee Boy

It gives me great comfort that even though Walter can't walk well yet, and I imagine it is stiff and painful to raise his leg, he is still picky about where he pees. I was trying to get a picture of how he raises his leg now (He used to raise it high up like a ballerina and now its more of a little "Ehn!" sound as he raises leg a half inch or so...) but look at him disgusted with me for snapping his picture whilst peeing! I'm sorry wally! I find you adorable no matter what you do. But fairs fair. No more indignities that aren't strictly medically related.

Friday, August 21, 2009

Walter's best time in the water tank!

Wally did 8 minutes in the water tank at TC rehab today! You can see him walking on the underground treadmill as the water supports his body and keeps him from tipping over. Also a vet tech in the back works his back legs so the nerves get used to the motion and grow to suit whats being required of them (Another reason it's important to keep in physio recovery, repetition is everything.)

Before all this, Walter had a morning romp in the back yard (only a couple of minutes, he's still on restricted movement) then a Strollie ride, (he's all yappertons at the poor neighbor dogs, who don't understand why Walter has to dish out such justice from inside a stroller) and then a nap before Physical therapy.

At the vet Walter's patient file says
WEIGHT: 22 lbs
AGE: 2 1/2 yrs
STATUS: TENTATIVE (Unknown if he will be crippled or recovered)

(I however feel it should say STATUS: SUPER PUG!)

Thursday, August 20, 2009

22 smackers?

It makes me so happy to hear you guys are buying, reading and even enjoying my books! It makes it easier to pay down Walters emergency room bill AND all your comments are making me work twice as hard on my current novel. (due in mere weeks! First page of next book is actually printed on the LAST page of PLM)

So - What would you do with 22 million dollars? Its another choose your own adventure type book and on the first page you win the lottery. So, just curious, what WOULD you guys do with 22 million biscuits? Walter here would buy a full-time pug Geisha, a lot more stuffies and an unlimited supply of beef bones. He'd also pay off all mommas bills so she would stop abandoning him to work! Blech!

Wednesday, August 19, 2009

Dominate the tank and beat the tornado!

We had quite an adventure on the way to Twin Cities Animal Rehab today! It hammered rain and we got to the clinic at what looked like midnight, even though it was 1 pm. Walter dominated the water tank with 7 whole minutes of walking on the submerged treadmill.
Then Walter did the trampoline like a regular aerobics instructor (Just needs a Flashdance tank top) and had his toenails clipped before we headed home. When we got back on the highway (clinic is about half an hour from home) we thought the sky looked worse and it was raining hard. We decided to get off the highway so we could get something to eat and let it stop storming. Good thing too, There were tornado touchdowns all along the I-35 corridor, unbeknownst to us! We went through a fast food drive thru (horrible, but we wouldn't leave walter in the car. No way!) We all had chicken sandwiches and finally decided to take surface streets home (an hour!)

When we got home, alll the sirens were blaring and we found out a tornado had gone thru our neighborhood and were running up and down I-35! We missed it by getting chicken sammies!! Go wally! Saving the tall people again!!!

Tuesday, August 18, 2009

Wally Walks!

It's clear we don't know what we're doing, but here's walter, fresh out of the laundry basket, giving it his all! It's only when he lifts his leg to pee he topples over, poor lil guy! It;s hard to see but his right rear leg is ankled under as he walks, so he's walking on the top pf his foot, rather than the pads. Still, he can get around short distances pretty good huh? Not bad for having an Escalade-size SUV roll over him a mere five weeks ago!!!

Thanks for the good advice yesterday everybody. Hurray Monday is over.

Monday, August 17, 2009


Is it Monday or is it me? Everything seems big again today. I can't work for more than a couple hours without doing physio ball or taking him out to pee or getting him fresh water. All things I want to do, but then whoops, HOW far behind am I with work? gulp. Go back to work, then back to the crib, then back to friends I haven't seen or let down b/c I'm swamped. I can't stick with any one thing, I keep getting pulled from one direction to the next. So many things and people need my attention, I feel I'm doing everything poorly. Today I am bad at this. Today lacks any rhythm. This is the long haul of the accident. This is the endurance run. Can I sustain it? can I keep going? Today I want to lay down and sleep, and never get up again. But I will, right? I will.

Sunday, August 16, 2009

Bones and Sun

I set up Walters portable crib in the backyard so he could let the neighbor dogs know who's boss. (Walter, as proven by big-boy barking) It was quite the setup to get outside, including the Eddie Bauer mattress pad he's on. Very fleecey. (Where did we get an Eddie Bauer mattress pad for our pug? I couldn't even hazard a guess.) I also gave Wallington a bone to gnaw on, which he did, even after I took him inside.

The air conditioning pixies dropped off a surprize air conditioner at our house today. The generous Bob Thompson had offered to lend us his, but we thought we'd try this unexpected one first. Bob, we will call you with the cooling-factor report ASAP! And thank you for the offer. really wonderful.

His right foot is still "ankling" or curling under, but we continue to religiously do his physio therapy on the peanut baall and we lift or "correct" his foot every time he starts walking on the top of his foot instead of the bottom. We say "Foot!" when we do this, hoping to train him to correct himself when we say "foot!" from across the room. We think he's learning, he's terribly brilliant.

I hope everyone had a weekend spent with loved ones. Today I really felt for the first time, a real and deep sense of out-of-the-woods-ness.We still have a long way to go, but the road doesn't seem terrifying right now. Thank you everyone for your loving kindness.

Friday, August 14, 2009

Frilly Pig, Donation Button, Water tank, Ahoy!

Updated: Home from Water World...

We went to physical therapy, and carting walter around in Laundry tubs just isn't cutting it anymore, so we had to get some serious hardware for the car.

In the tank he went, sans pamper, and he was much less weirded out this time, as was I. He went for 5 straight minutes, walking on a treadmill against a current.

Then it was spa time, when they turn the jets on and Walter sort of floats in place. He really likes this part, now that he's getting used to the loud clanking noises.

Also, after the water tank, Wally got his stitches out! The nurse was sooo good. It was one long thread, looped through his skin twenty-five times and I held walter as she patiently worked the entire thread out without cutting it. Think about that a minute...backing a stitch out 25 times without cutting it? I was amazed and grateful. We got another lesson on the physio peanut ball, and they gently (really gently) bounced walter on a trampoline, which is meant to help build back the severed nerves in his ankles so he can walk again. Best news? The vet said he looked better. THERE IS IMPROVEMENT. I want to do the "Improvement Dance" shuffle-shuffle-kick! shuffle-shuffle-kick!

Today when I had "the flashback" (the flashback of him getting hit by the car) I literally held my hand up and said, "NO!" out loud. Then I out loud listed all your names, mom, Meesh, harry Pugalicious, Pearl, Tweedles, Indy Bloggers etc...etc... until the flashback backed off and left me alone. I just have to drown out the bad thing with the good things...and there are many, many more good things (people) than bad.

Harry Pugalicious & Heather sent walter a Big Pig lookalike! WHAT? (if you read way back to the first blog posts, you'll find Big Pig was walters first love, until he destroyed the poor thing in a fit of "agressive pug love." ) and Walter has it tucked beside him now as he's sleeping. Thank you Heather and Harry! He loves the treats too! (He looks a little forlorn in this photo because I had just put my shoes on, and shoes are very bad to wally, they mean momma is going OUT, and that is not cool. After I ran out to the car, took them off again, he was oh yessssssss. Big Pig!)

Hero Alert **Bob Thompson is letting us use his AC!***

Also, to all of you who have been buying books, thank you so much. it continues to help us pay medical bills. Too those of you who have sent checks, we send you the sloppiest pug kisses aver, and to all of you who hit the donate button the day I had it up, we just ran into a little snag with Pay pal. The donations are there waiting for us, but they say we have to prove we're non-profit, not pirates etc...so I took the button down until we get ourselves sorted out. Rest assured your donations are (very!) safe, and we will work it out and let you know when we do.

Until then, if you want to send Walter anything at all to aid in his recovery, just email me at relativematter at yahoo and I will send you a good old-fashion snail mail address. We're sort of snail mail people. Not too fancy, just all pug.

thank you for your love and kindness, it is what we are all using to get through this very, very, very long ordeal. I re-read your posts all the time when I'm feeling low, and even quote them to Walter when he seems down.


Thursday, August 13, 2009

Foot Dragging and thread for Pohlee-Bear

Sorry about the break there everybody, I was dragging myself up the mountain work-wise, trying to get this ship to keep from sinking. I am back in the saddle, that is, quite literally sleeping in Scamperland with Walter. I've curled up in there with him a few times, only to wake an hour later, both of us snoring.

Walter walks a little, but is unable to feel his right foot. The therapist hopes this can be corrected over time, but I wish we could see more improvement now. I think of all the beds he's jumped on, all the rough-housing in the dog ark, I just can't see him crippled. Yet it seems he is. But they say it could improve...so I will just take one day, one step - at a time.

I took him outside to pee and he actually lifted his leg, just a little bit, 1/4 inch maybe off the ground, but I heard a bone pop and panicked. but in the end his movement was the same, I guess it was just a regular bone pop, like when you do something you haven't done in awhile. So he's okay.

He has shredded and re-shredded poh-lee bear, as you can see in the picture, the brown stuff is the other stuffed animal I sewed inside him for form. Walter keeps splitting the stitches and I'm wondering if we sewed him up with something stronger, even fishing line, would that hold better? I keep teasing Walter saying, "Stop ruining Pohlee Bear! We don't have money for thread!"

Thursday is THANKFUL THURSDAY and I am so thankful for all of you, and to those of you who have sent checks, care packages, well wishes, I hope we can one day repay you with the kindness you've shown us. We are humbled and grateful.

Tomorrow is the water tank!

Saturday, August 8, 2009

Alls well

We are having a quiet weekend. I have a big proposal due monday so Walter is chillin in Scamperland while I speed-write. This is a picture of the first time I took walter to the vets. first time ever. see all the stuff I thought I needed to bring with? It's only gotten more complicated since then!

He has started to get wise to the marshmallows, (but we got a whole WEEK out of them! Problem is he's too smart.) So we're looking for other pill camouflaging ideas if anyone has them.

I took Walter out in the Popemobile last night. (Stoller) It's all zipped up and enclosed, and I think he liked it...but he was scratching at the zippers (no idea why, there's tons of room in there, I think he just wanted out!) and barking his fool head off the whole time at potential threats, wherever they were, like the fire hydrant, a tree...a squirrel...anyway it looked like we had a Tasmanian Devil locked up in a rolling cart. Every time we passed someone I just had to say, "He got hit by a car, we really want to let him out but we can't...He got hit by a car, we really want to let him out but we can't..."

Oh wally. Disturbing the peace, just like a good pug should.

How I LOVE you!

Then we did physical therapy, where Walter has to lay over a ball and we rock him gently to stimulate nerve growth in his feet. Will get pictures but I dont' think Wally likes it at all. Then wrestled with pain pills and he finally went to sleep. He is really getting strong, relatively speaking, and it is getting harder to entertain him. He's like LET ME OUT OF THIS DAMN PEN!

Hope you're all doing great...

Thursday, August 6, 2009


Thank you for your kind words yesterday. I used them to float on to get today - and today was EXCELLENT! Walter had his first physical therapy water-tank treatment today AND HE WAS A STAR! Special thanks to mom who once again handled all the paperwork. without you....nope, not even picturing it.

Walter freaking swam!!!

Not only did the vet say Walter's dragging foot had a good chance of healing with time and patience, (and therapies and so on...) this treatment is specifically good for rebuilding those damaged nerves. Here is Walter looking unsure about going into the water tank:

Then he goes into the tank with a GREEN PAMPER on. Indignities!

He was not at all sure about the tank at first. The water fills to just under his chin so 80% of his bodyweight is supported. But can you imagine going in a big scary black tank and water fills to your chin?

but then he really started to get going! This is just after he swam (hard to get pics during because I am helping at the front of the tank.) but he swims for 2 minutes and then gets a 5 minute "spa" or whirlpoool bath and the vet tech massages his ears! oh yes she does!

when we got home, he was so tired, and conked out on Polie bear right away. I could not believe how strong he was or how far he swam. THIS BOY HAS A SHATTERED PELVIS, FRACTURED LEGS AND A BRUISED HEART! But he swam! He was exhausted and shaking a little afterwards, but mama scooped him up and rushed him home and now he's sleepinks the sleeps of champions!
I don't want to forget to give Thanks to the driver, Sarah, who has really been supportive and who's going through her own healing process.

Everyone else - Please continue to send us all your good thoughts everybody. It is friends, family and the love of complete strangers getting him through this. Your good will/thoughts/prayers are what we're using to get him healing. Once he's strong enough we plan WALTER TAKES AMERICA!!

Wednesday, August 5, 2009

determined okayness

Wally isn't sad, he just sometimes looks sad when he looks at me because he can tell I'm worried. This is what I mean to work on. I don't know how, I don't know with what, but I need to put the anxiety on the shelf. It isn't helping anyone, especially him. His right leg is trailing a bit more, we're not sure why. We go to Physical therapy tomorrow and hopefully she'll know why. Also scheduled an Xray at westgate pet clinic for Saturday at 11:30 to make sure that new screw is where it should be. Pray we can keep up all the payments! Thank you to everyone buying books btw. It is really helping. Jason is coming over to put up a donate button.

I have to re-commit myself to having a good time with him, on his terms. A good afternoon before the accident was going to the lake on a walk, well - now it's sitting in the pen and giving Walter a massage, then okay. I have to stop comparing now to then. I have to accept now for now. This is what it is. This is what we have and I have to learn to enjoy his company without fretting.

any tips on loving life even when it's filled more flaws than a glass engagement ring??

- okay Heather, stop mewling and list the miracles-

Walter is alive - against all odds
Everyone who sends messages
Everyone buying books
enough $$ - for the time being - for his care
cool weather (he doesn't overheat)
great doctors
strength to go on one more day
dreams dreams dreams. I dream we will run together again....

Oh! FYI I am on 107.1 Fm today at 4:30ish pm you may be able to listen live here:

Monday, August 3, 2009


Hard day. Not for Walter, he's taking all this in stride. I seemed to cry at the drop of any hat today. I cried if there was good news, cried if there was bad. I just couldn't stop. Maybe it's just a bad day, but everything seems overwhelming today. I am going to make some tea, light an Indy Blogger candle and try to work while wally sleeps. Must remember all I am grateful for, including, especially those darn mini marshmallows.

I wanted to stop feeling sorry for myself for one second and give a special shout out to Tweedles, we have tried to comment on your blog and the log-in is weird for us, but we will keep trying. We love you!

Also, Annie from INdiana, who sent Walter the BIGGEST bag of rawhides, he was num-num-numming them all day and didn't even notice his mama falling apart because he was in heaven! I hear you helped put this box together, and we thank you so SO much. It was and is a thing of beauty and so are you.
Heather and Walter

Saturday, August 1, 2009


Indy Bloggers sent Walter and me the most AMAZING and sweet gift. An entire box of goodies! Walter was SO SO excited! He helped me open the box, and I tried to get pictures, but he was moving fast!

I haven't seen him so happy since he came home. He KNEW the box was for him! I set it down in the pen and as he nosed through things we opened them, and the cool stuff would not end! it was the best care package EVER. Walter stood up for the whole unveiling! Stood on all four feet and wagged his tail!

The care package had stuffed animals, marshmallows, rawhides, and chew toys for Walter, and Candles and hand lotion for me. There was a pug calendar and address book! It was the biggest box and it was packed with love. I have to admit, halfway thru I burst into (happy) tears. I was so touched...and Walter, he wanted to try everything! all the delicious snacks! and the toys!
He loved his Kentuckian bandana! He gave every toy the once over, licking them on the head, shaking them, the sheep got it good and the little tiny stuffed pug? He held it in his mouth on and off for hours like a baby. He LOVES it. Indy Bloggers, I am so astounded with the stuff you sent. The angel pin! The protection charm! The wet wipes - which we needed at that moment desperately! The calendar is now his central vet appointment calendar...we transferred the dates and we put the cards up on his supply station by his bed. You have touched us and we are beyond grateful. We are amazed and Walter is snuggled in bed on top of his new Healing Blanket with all his new loot. In all this it never occurred to me to go get him new toys and stuff. We've been buying pain medications and pee pads - today we got the funnest stuff ever!!! Indy Bloggers, we can never repay you for your amazing grace. Thank you - thank you - thank you. I can see now that we need to get a PUG MOBILE and load up to come meet all you extraordinary people and pugs. We have never met, but you are all family.

Thank You for the Healing Blanket!

Nettie (blogger NASRENE) - who's been following Walter's blog, but who we've never even met - had her grandmother knit Walter a blanket! This blanket is amazing. Not only is it hand-knit with love, it's from a special line of blankets made just for people who need healing. Nasrene's grandmother has made them for cancer patients and other people who are trying to recover from something. When we unfolded it from the tissue paper, even though it was heavy and thick it felt cool and soothing, a healing blanket for sure! Such fun colors and AMAZING stitch work. Walter loves the different textures and the fact it was made in big-boy blue! I have never seen a blanket like it, and when I put it in Walters pen (SCAMPERLAND!) he immediately curled up on it and fell asleep. I mean like zonked out. Peaceful and snoring, which is the most heavenly sound to me, I can hear his bones healing when he does this.

I was so touched by this gift, I told Walter how important his recovery is, how so many people love him and are watching out for him. I told him there are more good things in this world than bad, more Miracles than we can count, and that there are angels all around us, disguised as friends and neighbors.

thank you for this priceless gift. we will treasure it always.

also to Kent Stemen, CONGRATULATIONS on adopting pug #3 - BUSTER!!!!!!!! We are so thrilled, and this experience has made me want to get another pug for sure. My heart is twice as big now!

Heather and Walter